Monday, 17 March 2014

House Move Part 2

Well here I am again a month after my last post and I thank GOD for anti depressants!!!!!  I am alive and well, not crying 24/7 and what a relief that is, I can now see the wood through the tree's and a pathway that may be walked.

So, not much has been done by many peoples standards but within my budget and others time constraints there is a big difference.
Firstly the house no longer smells of sewage, which was very off putting and extremely embarrassing. The shower floor has been tiled and the open sewage pipe is no more, phew!
Before being tiled, pooh stinky!
The toilet floor is also tiled and the wall tiles have been purchased for the shower. I have also purchased a new Petchka which has meant warmth without burning to death! The one that was here had holes in the side, a broken fire box door with a big hole under which would spit out hot sparks & fire! I now have a full size safe heater that will fit nicely into the kitchen, looks like an ancient Aga.
It will be a while before the shower room is finished as I have to put my money where it is most needed, which unfortunately means I will have lots of half done works to begin with. That is OK though as I know where it will all end up.
This will be my living room, almost there the wall paper is no more.
I am concentrating right now on getting a living room and bedroom then I can get the walls knocked down to create a through kitchen diner, so excited about that!!!!

So walls are stripped, ceiling has had first coat painted, the wall paint is awaiting it's application and Jo will be a very happy lady. Well I hope to be as I still find no joy in anything, it's just a sort of slightly smiley face feeling, but I am getting there I didn't even feel that a couple of weeks ago.

I am looking forward to having my own private space and a bed to sleep in. The sofa is just not comfortable any more, I wake around 5 am to an active puppy who wants to play with Lulu who is a lazy moo and won't get up before 9am so she growls till she is left alone, one good thing about being on the sofa is I can watch some mindless TV while I wake up.
My living space, everything goes on in this one room
Looking forward to getting out of here and into a proper living room and bedroom

The weather is changing but also changeable. I think we have had the last of the snow, not that it ever amounted to that much this year and the temps are up in double figures. We have had 24c and lovely sunshine then the last few days have been really windy. Right now it is blue sky with white cotton wool clouds with a strong breeze. I am looking forward to being in the garden soon but right now I need to be working inside.

I have advertised for workaways for the first time and have my first couple coming in April. So looking forward to them being here and having some company. I don't see anyone from one week to the next but then I am not bothered right now, just getting along on my own means I can sort my feelings out. It is funny who can listen to me cry, most can't, so it has whittled down who I can talk to but I have two constants who help me greatly, sometimes they just let me cry and tell me I will be OK.  It's funny, what people don't realise is, I don't need people to tell me what to do or remedy the situation, there is after all nothing that can be done by me or anyone else, I just need to be held hugged or allowed to cry. It is really hard to do this without being hugged or held, but that is how it is and I have had to get on with it, but what a lonely place it is.

I have decided to spend winter in UK, this could change, but I very much doubt it. It would take a Knight in shining armour to sweep me off my feet and take care of me to change this decision. I am 55 with knackered hands and back so winter is a very difficult time. Just getting the wood in then to survive in this house I would have to have central heating installed. This is financially not viable by Oct and to be honest I just can't face another freeze, another lonely birthday, New year or Valentines day. I have a lovely friend in UK who I can stay with and I will get to see my family, my new great Niece and my lovely friend Alison's new baby. I will get to go to church and mix with Christians again, it has given me something to look forward to and maybe I will see clearer what I will do with my life. I will though be back in the spring as this is my home that I love and I have afternoon tea events to organise :-)

So for now I am getting on, on my own, trying to burden no one, focusing on my home and me, oh and looking forward very much to Spring.

Happy Valentines day, House Move Part 1

I am sitting typing this with the sun streaming in the window burning my neck and head, fabulous!
The weather this year has been unbelievable. Right now it is like spring with warm temp's and glorious sunshine lifting spirits, certainly made me feel a lot better as I have been frozen, why? Well I have moved....

But first it is Valentines day today, so far I am coping well with it, but I have kept myself busy.
I adore Valentines day, love to receive beautiful gifts but I also love to give and it is a great day to be romantic, when maybe a partner is not so the rest of the year.  I know a lot of guys are all doom and gloom over it, oh get over yourself!!! It hurts your partner. I know so many women who have this in their lives and they are so hurt over it. Fair enough if you both feel the same otherwise it is just selfish behaviour. Fair enough if you buy your loved one beautiful gifts or do romantic surprises all through the year but the ones I know don't even do this :-(
I am not letting women off either, it is just I don't know any personally that have an aversion to Valentines, but it goes both ways.
So think of those of us who are in love & not loved back, it is a very sad day to have to get through but for you, you are lucky to have that person in your life, treat then well and enjoy a romantic day without moaning about it! If you don't want to pay for a card cause it is commercialism, well then make one! To be honest that is a bloody rubbish excuse.

So I have heart cake tins sitting on the side and had all good intentions of baking cakes and cup cakes but just haven't been able to. I will when the day is over in time for mothers day, I hope I don't hear the same excuses for that!!!!

I have moved house and gained a new baby puppy, I say baby cause she was only 3 weeks when I was given her. She is one of a littler of 8 and the mum either died or left them to die, which they very nearly did. Thankfully they were found, revived by warmth and milk then hand reared.
I was given Lilly  on the day of the move but she settled in really well, coped with a long car journey to me and all the upheaval of the day, with no adverse effects.
 I have been in the house for just over a month now and only just starting to get bits sorted, due to the fact it was bitter cold.  The house has only been lived in downstairs, then only in the kitchen and dining room, which was a living, sitting, bedroom for the lady who owned it. the rest of the house was bitter cold because no heating had been used upstairs or in the living room for donkeys years. The weather decided to turn and become cold just as I had moved in and then it snowed. I lost water downstairs for four days and upstairs for 5.

On moving in it became apparent how much work was needed, more than I thought.  I think it is more a case of if I was with Nigel it would be OK but on my own, and having to chase up getting the work done, it all became overwhelming.
I find it really hard being alone here, Bulgaria I mean, just getting the wood in alone and keeping the fire going is hard enough as my back is really weak. So I get 5 large metal pails of wood in, which means I get two whole days of not having to bring any in, which saves my back and stops me becoming unable to move.

The first thing that had to be dealt with was the state of the upstairs toilet! Waaaaaaghhhh so I didn't have to visit the notorious outside loo. The loo that is just a hole in the ground with a square wood bench with a hole in the middle and lino over the top so your bum is comfy and warm, the loo that my friend used but ended up with wet trousers! The loo that has cardboard sides and the door doesn't shut, the loo from hell than the old lady would rather use than get the septic emptied and use the inside loo's, yes two! One upstairs and one down. Both need new toilets and complete renovation.
I moved in on the Wednesday and on the Saturday Nigel got my toilet, boiler (the people took the boiler) curtain pole and Sat TV were all sorted for me. It is still a wonderful feeling even after only a couple of day to have hot running water and a flushing toilet! I am such a girl, not an outdoors y person at all, I like my creature comforts warmth, hot water, a decent toilet and shower.
I am soon to have most of the above as I have just bought the tiles for the toilet and shower room floor.
All the floors in the house are concrete and with no tiles on them they now stink, especially the shower room, so that is the first BIG job. The drain has to be sorted , it smells bad, and it's not the septic as I had to have that emptied the Monday after I moved in, then the stone sink has to be ripped out and a new sink put in. This is just to make it a clean place to use. Later I will have to replace the windows and the wall tiles in both the toilet and the shower room.
There is no kitchen to speak of, it is usable though. I am going to knock walls out and have a cottage kitchen but with plenty of work top space. The sink needs to be the first thing to change though, again it is concrete, and I hate it.

I could go on and on, but suffice to say I am looking forward to getting these things done and getting the first room decorated :-)

Moving was very emotional, wow I just didn't expect everything to get 10 times worse in a blink of an eye!  It took me by surprise. I don't think it getting and being so cold helped. I was not attached to the last house so it wasn't an issue leaving it, I guess I was very unsettled and felt very vulnerable.

Onwards and upwards x