Thursday, 31 March 2011

Happy Birthday Tony xxxxxxxx Flowers after the Rain

Today is my brother Tony's birthday. We lost Tony to valvular heart disease suddenly 8 yrs ago! No one knew, least of all Tony & it was & remains devastating to us all. Today has been a crying day, not one of happy memories just one of loss! How sad, how stupid & how awful that he is not with us. I know its a selfish day when it should be a happy day but I can remember him with gladness the rest of the year but the next two months are all about the sadness & loss. I am sure most people who have shared in such loss know what I mean. How do we cope, I don't know, life moves forward even when we don't want it to. I have been through a devastating divorce & got over it when I never thought I would see the light of day but the loss of a loved one NEVER goes away it just becomes livable!
Happy Birthday bro, miss you all the time & wish you were here with us! Be at peace till we see each other again xxx

After a day of rain the weeds have gone ballistic, but the flowers have popped out to brighten my day so thanks God, needed that :D

The weather is warmer out than in at the moment but for some reason I can't get the fire to stay alight :( so I am on a baking frenzy well a small one, just to warm the room up, well that's my excuse! Feeling a bit blehhhh the last couple of days. I am having a lot of trouble with my hands going numb & burning. I have been under the impression its carpal tunnel but it seems it could be arthritis in the neck so I am trying some specific tablets to see if they make a difference. So far they are helping but I think the medication needs to build up to be truly effective so I am knackered from hardly any sleep (as the pain wakes me all night) & everything is an effort. Still I am alive & thankful!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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